13 Tales 2012: The Seventh Tale

Thirteen Tales
Seventh Tale: The Tale of the Hard Core Game

"Hey Bob, check out this awesome new game I got!" It was a youth of about fourteen who ran into his friend's living room. He was dressed in a simple shirt and shorts and currently carrying an old gaming cartridge in his hand and had a look of anticipation upon his face.

"Todd, what is that? I thought you said you had a game." The other boy named Bob dressed in a pair of blue shorts and a white shirt stared at the cartridge unsure of what it is.

"This is a game! A long time ago instead of games just magically showing up on your computer you had to go to stores and purchase them!" Todd explained. "This is an old game.

"Purchase, at a store. Oh, you mean one of those... What are they called... CD things that games used to come on?" Bob asked.

"Even more ancient than that!" Todd explained. "This is before CDs."

"I didn't know there was such a period. So, why are you so excited, we have plenty of new games to play, like Generic Brown Shooter, and Regenerating Health the Game! We don't need to dig up artifacts from a previous time." Bob protested.

"But you don't get it, the game is supposed to be really hard core!" Todd explained. "Like the hardest game ever made.

"What, are the continue points really far apart or something?" Bob asked.

"There are no continue points, you have to restart the entire level if you die." Todd explained.

"That.... That just doesn't make sense, that's impossible." Bob snatched the cartridge from Todd and examined it. "What is this.... Bandanna Fox? It looks like a kid's game... And is the cartridge supposed to glow green, it looks radioactive

"Ugh, you just don't get it. Fine let me show you." Todd snatched the game back before moving to a TV and setting up a very old and very dusty gaming system next to it. "Here, I'll bet you $5 that you can't get past stage one without screwing up."

"Very well, I guess I can play a kid's game for a guarantee five bucks." Bob shrugged and watched as Todd set up the game.

Todd turned the game system on with the game in it, but there was only static on the screen. He turned it on and off several times but nothing happened. He left it on for a moment staring at the screen filled with static and felt his heart sink as he realized the game wasn't going to start.

"Relax. It probably wasn't that good any-" Bob started to speak, but was cut off as a giant purple robot that looked a bit like an Easter Island head bursts through the wall. It had four hands covered by white gloves coming out of its body each on the end of a long metal coil that moved freely like a tentacle. "The hell is that!?"

"TWO PLAYER GAME ACCEPTED!" The giant robot shouted. "GAME START LASER! FIIIIIIIIIIIIIRE!" The mouth on the robot opened up firing a giant beam of energy that struck both the boys standing in the room. When the light from the beam vanished both of them were quite a bit different than before.

Where Todd was standing there was now an anthropomorphic fox only about three feet in height with electric blue fur. The pattern of a thunderbolt was etched into his back and on his tail. His eyes were now a much brighter green that seemed to crackle with energy. He was also naked except for a single red bandanna that was worn around his neck.

Bob had been transformed into a fox as well, he stood about a head taller than Todd and was covered in fiery red fur. There was a flame symbol in his back fur and on his tail. His eyes were orange now and seemed to burn with fire. Like Todd, he was dressed in only a bandanna that was for some reason worn around his neck and it was colored blue.

"The heck!?" Bob shouted and then threw his hands down to cover himself. "We're naked!?"

"Wow, these are really good graphics Todd commented staring in awe at the robot."

"GAME START CONFIRMED! ATTACK MODE! KILL BANDANNA FOX!" The robot gave a shout, before two of its hands thrust out at the two newly transformed foxes. The blue one managed to avoid it by diving behind the couch, but the robot successfully grabbed the red fox and lifted him off the ground. "PLAYER TWO CAPTURED." The robot voice spoke.

"HA!" Todd gave a shout as he peaked out from behind his couch."You owe me five dollars!"

"TRANSITION TO LEVEL 1!" The robot shouted before flying out of the hole in the wall it had created carrying the red fox with him.

"Hey, wait!" Todd shouted. "You can't take him! He owes me money!" With that he chased after the robot through the hole that had been left.

Level 1 Start!

Todd found himself running through his own neighborhood, but the location had changed drastically. For some reason the street seemed to have random bottomless pits now included and there were segments which he had to jump up on the roof of a house to get by. The strange thing was jumping from a house roof to a tree, and then on top of a street lamp turned out to be rather effortless. There were also these strange robots that looked like clockwork toads. They would just slowly walk towards him and were mostly easy to avoid. One of them he accidentally jumped on top of at one point, and as he did the robot exploded, and somehow he was completely unharmed. He continued to follow in the direction he had seen the larger robot go and continue dafter it.

Level 2 Start!

"Wait, was this forest always here?" The blue fox looked around confused as he entered a forest that he would have sworn was not always right next to his neighborhood. Either way, the robot had taken his friend this way and he had to keep going. In the forest he mostly was jumping from tree to tree. It was strange how the limbs of trees formed perfectly flat platforms he could land on. The robots had gotten more aggressive, including no robots that would fire small yellow bullets at him. Luckily the bullets moved slowly enough that he could roll or jump over them. There was something else new in this forest as well. Every now and then he'd come across a treasure chest. They opened as soon as he touched them, and most of them only contained gold coins. One however, contained a blue flower. For some reason he had the strangest urge to eat it. As he did he felt a strange power flow through him as he sprouted a second tail and suddenly electricity was twirling around his hands. He discovered much to the dismay of several of the robots that he could point in a direction and hurl a bolt of blue electricity where he was pointing. That certainly made fighting easier.

Level 3 Start!

"Okay, I know this wasn't here." Todd stared up at the mountain. The strange thing was in this area when he tried to walk to the right or left things didn't seem to work, the only direction to go was up the mountain itself. However rather than climb he had to jump from platform to platform. The strangest thing was after jumping so high up he'd no longer be able to see the platforms below him and it looked like he'd fall forever if he fell. At one point he made a hurried jump and wound up colliding with one of the robots. As he did he felt a sharp burst of pain as his second tail disappeared and he was no longer able to fire electric bolts. He then spent the rest of the climb running away from angry clockwork frogs firing yellow energy bolts at him.

Level 4 Start!

At the top of the mountain there was this ancient looking temple. It was filled with all kinds of traps such as platforms that would fall away as soon as Todd landed on them. The first few levels had built up his reflexes though and now he was able to jump to a new platform as soon as he landed. In this level he found a treasure chest that opened to a new item. A yellow flower, remembering what the blue flower did he devoured it in an instant. However, this one had a rather undesirable effect. The entire temple suddenly got larger and the small frogs now towered over the fox. By eating the yellow flower he had been reduced in height to a mere inch tall!

"Trap item! Trap item!" The fox shouted as he darted around enemies and ran for end of the temple as fast as he could.

Level 5 Start!

A still shrunken Todd entered a strange lab in the end of the runes. It looked brand new, and had an excess supply of tesla coils that seemed to serve no purpose. Early in the area he found a treasure box containing another blue flower. He ate it, but instead of sprouting a second tail all it did was return him to his proper size, well his three foot tall size at least. Still, it was a relief not to have to worry about the frog robots stepping on him. This area seemed to have even more traps than the last, random floor pieces that would become electrocuted, new robots that jumped around and moved a lot faster, and jumps that Todd just barely managed to make by grabbing onto the ledge after he jumped. He felt he must be getting close to a new area when he found another treasure chest with a blue flower. He ate it, sprouting a second tail again and gaining his electric projectiles back. Then, he entered a large room. There were two bridges connecting to a central platform. As he crossed it the bridges vanished and the platform he was on floated before an endless pit.

"PLAYER DETECTED! ERROR! DESTROY ALL PLAYERS!" As its voice cried out the giant Easter Egg Island Head Robot crashed into the room from the ceiling landing on the platform before floating into the air. "PLAYER SIGHTED! KILL! KILL! KILL!"

"Where's my friend?" Todd narrowed his eyes as he stared at the robot.

"ALL SHALL BE ELIMINATED!" The robot shouted. "BANDANNA FOX SHALL BE DEFEATED! NOSEHEAD IS THE VICTOR!"

"Your name is Nosehead?" Todd blinked, then remembered he was in a situation. "Hey! You're going to tell me what I want right now, or I'll beat it out of you! I can jump on you! These paws are lethal weapons ya know!"

"BANDANNA FOX CAN NOT HOPE TO WIN!" The robot shouted. "PLAYER TWO HAS ALREADY LOST! YOUR GAME WILL NOW END!"

As the robot spoke music started to play, it was a strange mix of rock and jazz fitting a climactic battle. The robot moved to the center of the room striking out with its hands to try and grapple the blue fox. However, Todd had five levels of training to hone his reflexes for this fight. He nimbly dodged each and every attack from the robot and retaliated by firing his small thunderbolts back at the robot at every chance he had. Soon, the robot switched up its pattern. It would move to the side of the room and then rush across the entire platform forcing Todd to jump over him to survive. If that wasn't bad enough, the robot dropped mines on the ground as he did, forcing Todd to dodge the explosions as he returned fire. After a few rounds of this the robot floated high into the air.

"ERROR! WHY DOES BANDANNA FOX CONTINUE TO FIGHT!?" The robot shouted. "NOSEFACE CAN NOT LOSE!"

"Because!" Todd clenched a fist and grinned, getting completely into his role. "I'm here to rescue my friend.... And also get my $5."

"ERROR! ERROR! ERROR! ERROR! ILLOGICAL! ERROR! ERROR! ERROR! 1011010101010101010 10101010101 01010101010111110001101 10101011010101!"

A light erupted from the robot, as it did it grew in side and sprouted legs, as well as eve more arms. In a few moments it was a gigantic monster towering over the entire platform, its body stretching down into the bottomless pit before.

"So, it's final boss time." Todd observed.

"THIS SHALL BE YOUR END!" The robot screeched.

"No this is your end!" Todd gave a shout.

The previous music faded giving away to a pure rock theme as the two fought. The giant robot would slam fist after fist down fire beams from its mouth and nostrils, drop mines on the field, and as the battle continued even destroy segments of the floor. Todd dodged to the best of his ability utilizing flips, barrel rolls, and at one point jumping on one of the fist as it slammed down to jump over another. He fired bolt after bolt, but then something happened. He managed to dodge one fist slamming down only for him to land on a land mine! As it exploded his body was wracked with pain! He was physically fine, but his second tail and with it his power to fire lightning vanished.

"NOW YOU SHALL TASTE DEFEAT!" The robot shouted before slamming all of its hands down at Todd.

"No, NOT YET!" Todd rolled out from beneath where all the hands collided, jumping onto one of the fist and running up the arm. He still had one hope. "Here goes, EVERYTHING I'VE GOT!" He jumped up and landed on top of the robot's giant head bouncing off of it.

"ERROR!" The robot shouted. "THIS CANNOT BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" Small tiny explosions went off around the robot's body before eventually the entire body exploded into several tiny pieces that then each fired off into the sky exploding into a mass of fireworks. The evil Noseface had been vanquished and the bridges appeared bordering what remained of the platform.

Todd ran across the bridge to the other end of the lab opening a door leading to a room where Bon the red fox was suspended from the ceiling tied up by his tail. Todd quickly jumped up removed the rope typing Bob causing him to land on the ground on his face. He got up no worse for the wear and sighed.

"Okay fine, maybe these old games have something to them after all." He shrugged. "So, I guess. Wanna try it again?" He asked.

"Maybe later." Todd replied. "First, you owe me $5.00, and eating all these flowers has really given me a craving for a cheeseburger, let's pick up lunch on the way home.

"Fine... Fine." Bob sighed as the two left the lab and started the trek back to the neighborhood. "Wait a second.... Are we stuck like this?"

"I dunno, maybe a Game Genie code can fix it." Todd suggested.

"Pfft, only losers use cheat codes. Let's just go get burgers." Bob replied and the two  quickly put the game out of mind for now.